I Have Blue Balls

Posted on Friday

Yup, that’s my profound thought for the week.

I have balls. And they’re blue, too.

*pause for the men to hastily clear the room*

Not only that, but I love my blue balls.

Well, YES, I’m talking laundry. Aren’t you?

blue balls

Behold the Spiky Blue Balls in all their Glory!

Thing is, I can’t have anything to do with scented dryer sheets. Those things make me sick in the cupboard, on the clothes in the closet, and on the very air in the neighborhood when someone else is using them.  I hate them.  I hate having my decently clean air polluted by them.  And I don’t want those chemicals near me or my dogs.


(Not that I feel strongly about it or anything.)

So for lo these many years, I haven’t messed with clothes softening. I use unscented products, and I use natural fibers that don’t tend toward static cling. I didn’t really feel as though I was missing anything, either. And when someone recently suggested these dryer balls to me, I was all, “Eh. Whatever.”

But then the dryer balls arrived in my house.


Hey, they work! They don’t stink! They make things fluffier and softer (but don’t talk to me about static). Plus they add enrichment value to laundry time…there’s just no telling where they’ll hide in the laundry, and they worm their way into sleeves, pant legs, and what have you.  And aren’t they cute, escaping from the sheets to bounce across the floor?  Gotta be quick in this house if you want to look like that and not be a dog toy.

So it’s a WIN for the laundry! Spiky blue balls will always have a place in this house.

Though generally, I should mention, this isn’t something you want a fantasy writer to be pondering.

It really isn’t.

*pause for any bravely remaining men to quit the scene*

About Doranna

My books are SF/F, mystery, paranormal romance, and romantic suspense. My dogs are Beagles, my home is the Southwest, and the horse wants a cookie!
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8 Responses to I Have Blue Balls

  1. Patty Wilber says:

    Ha! Happen to sort of like my scented drier sheets, but the balls do sound fun–can add to the missing soap scoops that get lost in the washer! Plus I actually did throw out a box of scented sheets because they DID make me want to gag every time I walked in the house (and gave me a headache)!

  2. Doranna says:

    That’s what every scented dryer sheet does to me…even when it’s on the wind. So I say people can have their scented dryer sheets as long as they vent the dryer in the house! Yeah!

    (making no comment on the likelihood of this)

  3. Mo says:

    I have a similar problem Dee. Right now I’m not using a dryer, so this doesn’t currently bother me. BUT — I’ve been reading in some of the frugal blogs about natural treatments, and the vote for a quarter cup of white vinegar in the final rinse is getting a lot of net-play. Since I keep white vinegar on hand (in a spritzer, half & half with water, it’s great for clearing out the air around the litter pans), I plan to try this next laundry — provided I can remember to get to the washer for the last rinse.


    • Doranna says:

      Hi, Mo!

      I’d love to hear how that works. I bet it depends some on your water hardness.

      Unfortunately, the smell of vinegar…

      Well, you get the idea.

      (I always have it on hand, though–for soaking nozzles and spigot strainers…and killing small ant hills.)

  4. Kristen B. says:

    I have a pair of those… And yes, they do add excitement.

  5. Doranna says:

    Plus a certain amount of thumpity thumpity when the dryer is going. I don’t mind that–it means I catch it when it stops. ;>

  6. Christine says:

    ::helpless laughter::

  7. Doranna says:

    Mwah ha haaa!

Comments are closed.